My Twins Are Not Circus Animals :: 3 Ridiculous Things to Ask Moms of Multiples

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Dear random stranger,

You know when you go to the circus and you see the animals in the cage, it’s different than seeing them at the zoo. It’s not like you haven’t seen at least 400 Bengel Tigers in your life, but when you see the circus tiger, well.. That’s got to be the most AMAZING THING you’ve ever seen! Right?!

For the record, my twins aren’t those tigers and this ain’t the circus, lady. Given the fact that the girls are two (almost three), surely I thought that people would get over the fact that they are twins and not stare at us like caged animals they’ve never seen before. It was even worse when they were infants. Sure, I get the fact that twins draw attention when you see them together, and I know my girls are adorable (I’m a tad bias) therefore it draws more ooohsss and aawwwwww’s from the crowd. But, honestly, as a mom of multiples its SO annoying. I’ve been asked plenty of insane questions being a twin mommy, but these are the top three most ridiculous things to approach a twin mommy and ask.

  • The dreaded “ARE-THEY-TWINS???”- I think its universal when I say this annoys us more than anything. No, they just look alike and resemble each other identically. I know that you also “know someone who knows someone who had twins and they looked like this and acted like this and did this.” Ok let’s stop there. Yes they are twins. Yes they look exactly alike, and resemble each other’s mannerisms. Yes they are cute. Yes they are their own people though. Move along.
  • The unanswerable “WELL, HOW DID YOU HAVE THEM??” – Let’s get this straight. You don’t know me, but you want to know my fertility chart and about the birds and the bees? How do you think we had them? To your dismay, I’m actually open about the fact that my husband and I did go through the process of IVF and our twins were the result of that. I’d be happy to talk to you about it – one on one- over coffee. But, being this is the second sentence you’ve said to me since you approached me at the gas station, I dont think it’s appropriate to chat about when I’m pumping (gas that is).
  • The almost understandable “I BET THEY SAY AND DO EVERYTHING EXACTLY THE SAME”. This one doesn’t annoy me, but I feel I should remind you that although they are twins (remember that first question you squealed at us?) they are also two different little girls. As a mother, it’s important to me that they celebrate what makes them special by being a set of muliples, but I also want them to remember they are amazing and different individuals too. Our girls are as opposite as night and day. And just as they are opposite, they have so many similarities that make them so alike. It’s a beautful combo.

At the end of the day, dear stranger, the ridiculous comments and questions are annoying. I never am bothered by those who approach us with kind smiles and brief “hello’s” for our family. Being a mom of multiples IS AWESOME and thank you for taking the time to acknowledge that, but let’s not stop traffic anymore.



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2 thoughts on “My Twins Are Not Circus Animals :: 3 Ridiculous Things to Ask Moms of Multiples

  1. You are not alone on this.. There are times I don’t answer back out of frustration.. I have fraternal boy/girl twins and I hate it when strangers ask me why they don’t look alike or when every time we use the double stroller and someone would ask if they are twins.

    Life with multiples.. 🙂


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